About Me

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Just your average, ordinary, everyday princess.

A Princess in her own mind...

Why yes, I know what you're thinking... I know her and she is no princess! Well, you know what they say about your perception... it is your reality! Besides ask my family, they'll tell you I am definitely a Princess... in my own mind!

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Another May 10th!

So this morning in a meeting, our school social worker made the comment that for such a small town, some really weird things happen in Olney. He wasn’t talking to me, however looked at me and said “right Kristen?” “If anyone in here knows that firsthand it is you.” The other people in the room looked quizzically at me as he (the social worker) proceeded to tell them his recollection of what he had no idea was May 10, 1991… 20 years ago today. I told them it was indeed 20 years ago today that my life was altered forever. Here is my post from last year. Just as my mother reposted hers, here is mine.

Today I am twice as old as what it seemed that my life span was going to be on at this moment 20 years ago. I will tell you, the past 20 years seemed to have gone a lot faster than the first 20 years for some reason. I started to write about my night 20 years ago and while it always seems familiar, I remembered I blogged my thoughts about this last year. I feel the exact same way as I did last year. And even though I still have no more an indication of what God has in store for me, I still believe there is a plan. I hope with all my heart that when I am 20 x 3 that I will be blogging about all the great things that have happened and are continuing to happen in my life!

How many people can say beyond a shadow of a doubt where they were or what they were doing at exactly this moment 20 years ago? Probably a little over a dozen that I know of... me, my parents, Jenny, Keith, Jeremy, and I would say around 7 or 8 of my friends (if someone were to point out that today is May the 10th.)
20 years ago today at this very moment, my family was praying, my friends were crying, and I... well, I was dying. Yes, 20 years ago today I got a second chance at life. Not many people have to go through what me and my family went through, (and I am thankful that not many people have to) but not many people then have the testimony that I have.
20 years ago today, I was shot. It was a day that changed my life forever. It did not end like a sad movie, (thank the Lord) even though it was touch and go for a while. Instead it ended with me having a much greater appreciation for life and for those around me. It caused me to be more thankful for the good things in my life. Even now, 20 years later, when I feel like things are falling down around me, I look back and reflect on this very night 20 years ago and I realize that God has a plan and since he kept me here then I have a part in that plan.
I would love to be able to say I knew exactly what that plan was, or how it would come to full fruition, but I can't... 20 years later and I still don't know. I may never know, (at least not while I'm on this earth) but I truly believe we all have a purpose...A plan. And if we stay on the right track, God will be true to his word and give us a hope and a future (Jer 29:11)

Friday, April 22, 2011

Do you want a donut?

There was a certain Professor of Religion named Dr. Christianson, a studious man who taught at a small college in the western United States .

Dr. Christianson taught the required survey course in Christianity at this particular institution.

Every student was required to take this course their freshman year, regardless of his or her major.

Although Dr. Christianson tried hard to communicate the essence of the gospel in his class, he found that most of his students looked upon the course as nothing but required drudgery. Despite his best efforts, most students refused to take Christianity seriously.

This year, Dr. Christianson had a special student named Steve. Steve was only a freshman, but was studying with the intent of going onto seminary for the ministry. Steve was popular, he was well liked, and he was an imposing physical specimen. He was now the starting center on the school football team, and was the best student in the professor's class.

One day, Dr. Christianson asked Steve to stay after class so he could talk with him.

"How many push-ups can you do?"

Steve said, "I do about 200 every night."

"200? That's pretty good, Steve," Dr. Christianson said. "Do you think you could do 300?"

Steve replied, "I don't know.... I've never done 300 at a time"

"Do you think you could?" again asked Dr. Christianson.

"Well, I can try," said Steve.

"Can you do 300 in sets of 10? I have a class project in mind and I need you to do about 300 push-ups in sets of ten for this to work. Can you do it? I need you to tell me you can do it," said the professor.

Steve said, "Well... I think I can...yeah, I can do it."

Dr. Christianson said, "Good! I need you to do this on Friday.. Let me explain what I have in mind."

Friday came and Steve got to class early and sat in the front of the room. When class started, the professor pulled out a big box of donuts. No, these weren't the normal kinds of donuts, they were the extra fancy BIG kind, with cream centers and frosting swirls. Everyone was pretty excited it was Friday, the last class of the day, and they were going to get an early start on the weekend with a party in Dr. Christianson's class.

Dr. Christianson went to the first girl in the first row and asked, "Cynthia, do you want to have one of these donuts?"

Cynthia said, "Yes."

Dr. Christianson then turned to Steve and asked, "Steve, would you do ten push-ups so that Cynthia can have a donut?"

"Sure!" Steve jumped down from his desk to do a quick ten. Then Steve again sat in his desk. Dr. Christianson put a donut on Cynthia's desk.

Dr. Christianson then went to Joe, the next person, and asked, "Joe, do you want a donut?"

Joe said, "Yes." Dr. Christianson asked, "Steve would you do ten push-ups so Joe can have a donut?"

Steve did ten push-ups, Joe got a donut. And so it went, down the first aisle, Steve did ten push-ups for every person before they got their donut.

Walking down the second aisle, Dr. Christianson came to Scott. Scott was on the basketball team, and in as good condition as Steve. He was very popular and never lacking for female companionship..

When the professor asked, "Scott do you want a donut?"

Scott's reply was, "Well, can I do my own push-ups?"

Dr. Christianson said, "No, Steve has to do them."

Then Scott said, "Well, I don't want one then."

Dr... Christianson shrugged and then turned to Steve and asked, "Steve, would you do ten push-ups so Scott can have a donut he doesn't want?"

With perfect obedience Steve started to do ten push-ups.

Scott said, "HEY! I said I didn't want one!"

Dr.. Christianson said, "Look! This is my classroom, my class, my desks, and these are my donuts. Just leave it on the desk if you don't want it." And he put a donut on Scott's desk.

Now by this time, Steve had begun to slow down a little. He just stayed on the floor between sets because it took too much effort to be getting up and down. You could start to see a little perspiration coming out around his brow.

Dr. Christianson started down the third row. Now the students were beginning to get a little angry. Dr.. Christianson asked Jenny, "Jenny, do you want a donut?"

Sternly, Jenny said, "No."

Then Dr. Christianson asked Steve, "Steve, would you do ten more push-ups so Jenny can have a donut that she doesn't want?"

Steve did ten....Jenny got a donut.

By now, a growing sense of uneasiness filled the room. The students were beginning to say, "No!" and there were all these uneaten donuts on the desks..

Steve also had to really put forth a lot of extra effort to get these push-ups done for each donut.

There began to be a small pool of sweat on the floor beneath his face, his arms and brow were beginning to get red because of the physical effort involved.

Dr. Christianson asked Robert, who was the most vocal unbeliever in the class, to watch Steve do each push up to make sure he did the full ten push-ups in a set because he couldn't bear to watch all of Steve's work for all of those uneaten donuts. He sent Robert over to where Steve was so Robert count the set and watch Steve closely.

Dr. Christianson started down the fourth row.. During his class, however, some students from other classes had wandered in and sat down on the steps along the radiators that ran down the sides of the room. When the professor realized this, he did a quick count and saw that now there were 34 students in the room. He started to worry if Steve would be able to make it.

Dr. Christianson went on to the next person and the next and the next. Near the end of that row, Steve was really having a rough time. He was taking a lot more time to complete each set.

Steve asked Dr. Christianson, "Do I have to make my nose touch on each one?"

Dr. Christianson thought for a moment, "Well, they're your push-ups. You are in charge now. You can do them any way that you want." And Dr. Christianson went on.

A few moments later, Jason, a recent transfer student, came to the room and was about to come in when all the students yelled in one voice, "NO! Don't come in! Stay out!"

Jason didn't know what was going on. Steve picked up his head and said, "No, let him come."

Professor Christianson said, "You realize that if Jason comes in you will have to do ten push-ups for him?"

Steve said, "Yes, let him come in. Give him a donut."

Dr. Christianson said, "Okay, Steve, I'll let you get Jason's out of the way right now. Jason, do you want a donut?"

Jason, new to the room, hardly knew what was going on. "Yes," he said, "give me a donut."

"Steve, will you do ten push-ups so that Jason can have a donut?"

Steve did ten push-ups very slowly and with great effort. Jason, bewildered, was handed a donut and sat down.

Dr Christianson finished the fourth row, and then started on those visitors seated by the heaters. Steve's arms were now shaking with each push-up in a struggle to lift himself against the force of gravity. By this time sweat was profusely dropping off of his face, there was no sound except his heavy breathing; there was not a dry eye in the room..

The very last two students in the room were two young women, both cheerleaders, and very popular. Dr. Christianson went to Linda, the second to last, and asked, "Linda, do you want a doughnut?"

Linda said, very sadly, "No, thank you."

Professor Christianson quietly asked, "Steve, would you do ten push-ups so that Linda can have a donut she doesn't want?"

Grunting from the effort, Steve did ten very slow push-ups for Linda.

Then Dr. Christianson turned to the last girl, Susan. "Susan, do you want a donut?"

Susan, with tears flowing down her face, began to cry. "Dr. Christianson, why can't I help him?"

Dr Christianson, with tears of his own, said, "No, Steve has to do it alone; I have given him this task and he is in charge of seeing that everyone has an opportunity for a donut whether they want it or not.. When I decided to have a party this last day of class, I looked at my grade book. Steve here is the only student with a perfect grade. Everyone else has failed a test, skipped class, or offered me inferior work. Steve told me that in football practice, when a player messes up he must do push-ups. I told Steve that none of you could come to my party unless he paid the price by doing your push-ups. He and I made a deal for your sakes."

"Steve, would you do ten push-ups so Susan can have a donut?"

As Steve very slowly finished his last push-up, with the understanding that he had accomplished all that was required of him, having done 350 push-ups, his arms buckled beneath him and he fell to the floor.

Dr. Christianson turned to the room and said, "And so it was, that our Savior, the Messiah, Yahushua, on the cross, plead to the Father, 'Into thy hands I commend my spirit.' With the understanding that He had done everything that was required of Him, He yielded up His life. And like some of those in this room, many of us leave the gift on the desk, uneaten. "

Two students helped Steve up off the floor and to a seat, physically exhausted, but wearing a thin smile.

"Well done, good and faithful servant," said the professor, adding, "Not all sermons are preached in words."

Turning to his class, the professor said, "My wish is that you might understand and fully comprehend all the riches of grace and mercy that have been given to you through the sacrifice of our Master and Savior, the Messiah, Yahushua. He spared not His Only Begotten Son, but gave Him up for us all, for the whole Assembly, now and forever. Whether or not we choose to accept His gift to us, the price has been paid."

"Wouldn't you be foolish and ungrateful to leave it lying on the desk?"

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad

45... yes 45 years ago, my parents, Leon Redman and Carol Cleaver, walked down the isle proclaimed their love before God and man and officially became the first of "the Redmans." I am sure they would say that they have seen a lot of good (and some maybe not so good) times in those 45 years, but they saw them together. 45 years is a long time. Obviously longer than I have been alive (way longer than I have been alive!) Even after all this time, my father still surprised my mom with a big vase full of roses. With the way this world is today and with so many marriages falling apart, it is refreshing to see two people still loving each other after 45 years. So kudos to you, my parents, for making it to 45 years. I am sure your four wonderful, always behaving children had a lot to do with the success of your marriage. Whatever would you have done without us??? Ok mom, there is no reason to bring up your 25th anniversary. That is waaaaaay in the past! :) Anyways, just wanted to say HAPPY ANNIVERSARY MOM AND DAD! May there be many more!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

SHOWER DOORS

I know, doesn’t sound like a real catchy title for a blog post, but shower doors are what have really been on my mind lately.

For the past several years for every occasion that I could be getting a gift from my parents (birthday and Christmas typically) I have been asking my dad for new shower doors and installation. It may seem like a silly gift to ask for to some, but nonetheless practical and something that I, with all my heart, desire. While I realize that shower doors are not an absolute necessity, (one could make it through life without them) good ones sure do make life easier. They require a little maintenance and a little scrubbing from time to time, but they save you time by keeping the water in the shower so you aren’t cleaning it up off the floor everyday. Plus they don’t have those horrible plastic shower curtain hangers that never work right that cut your hands or break while you are trying to put them on, you don’t need to buy an extra shower curtain rod that inevitably never hangs straight, and if well maintained, they don’t get mold all over them like a shower curtain that you have to keep replacing, thus saving you money in the long run as well.

Having broken shower doors is not any better than a shower curtain either. They take time to try to keep them on the tracks, often not closing properly thus getting water all over the floor. Again, taking more time to clean up the mess and not to mention making more laundry to do, therefore wasting more time, more water and more money. In addition, if the hardware is broken on them you can cut yourself on a regular basis causing unnecessary pain and suffering, as well as time and money buying stock in band-aid bandages.

So you may be asking, “Why have I been asking for them for so many years now?” Well, because my father said he would give me shower doors and install them... and because he said it I believe him.

Despite my dad saying he will give me new shower doors and installation, I still have broken shower doors with an uneven shower curtain hanging in front of them. I am still mopping up water and buying entirely too many band-aids. And not a day goes by that I don’t long for my new shower doors. Side note: In case you are wondering why I don’t just do it myself it is because I have tried putting in shower doors once before and ended up basically collapsing the entire shower around me (I am not kidding about that) so I know better than to try to do it myself. I really do try to learn from my past mistakes as much as possible.

So here I am with another Christmas gone by and another birthday on the horizon... I must admit, I do get a little weary of waiting sometimes. I’m thinking I may need to start putting my request out there a little more frequently. There are a few holidays coming up. Maybe we could do gifts for Presidents’ Day and oh yes, Valentine’s Day is coming up, and Pulaski Day, and St. Patrick’s Day, and Easter and.............

And by the way... this post is not only about shower doors in case I was a little too cryptic in my analogy.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Good Ole Days, Flashback, or I Ain't as Good as I Once Was?

So today I did the same thing that I do every Thursday... go to work. But on Thursdays I don't stay at the elementary school. Midway through the day I have to go to ERHS... yes, my former High School. Now most days I just walk through the front doors and go directly to the room I do speech therapy in and just do my job and then leave, but today for some reason was different.

From the second I walked in the door today, it felt like I was back in high school again. The aroma coming from the cafeteria was the first thing I noticed... it smelled just like it did in the late 80s. I paused just for a second and then continued down the hall that now has carpet and a nice paint job, but the sound of the lockers opening and slamming shut once again just made me fondly (or not so fondly) flash back to all the stuff I crammed into the locker that I shared with Mike Kuenstler all 4 years of high school. We weren't supposed to do that ya know, but "K" names got a locker right in the middle and "R" names were always either down in Ag Hall or Home Ec Hall. We only had 4 minutes to get from class to class, so a locker in the middle was a necessity.

Instead of going to the room I usually do therapy in, I had to go upstairs. Walking up the stairs I again felt like a high schooler. I felt like I was out of class on a pass going to my locker or something. I walked back downstairs and went into the Guidance Office where I used to be a "guidance girl" and looked at the bulletin board behind the secretary's desk. So many of the past guidance workers (guys started working in there a lot more my senior year) pictures were thumbtacked behind her desk...including mine. (And my brother's picture too from a few years later.)

As I walked out to leave the school, feeling like a high schooler, a group of what I will call "farm boys" were coming in. One of them opened the door for me and said here you go ma'am. What??? Ma'am??? Hmmm.... even in my cute winter coat, sunglasses and stylish boots, I was not going to pass for a cute little high school girl anymore. My hopes of ever starring on 21 Jump Street were crushed. (The fact that I remember 21 Jump Street proves that I am no longer a cute little high school girl.) Back to reality... Back to work!

Friday, December 31, 2010

Good Bye 2010

On this last day of the year, I sit here in my house listening to the pouring rain outside reflecting on the past 365 days. Its been a different kind of year, 2010. Well, maybe not. There have been some good times and some not so good times; I have made some new friends, reconnected with some old (well past) friends; laughed some, cried some; learned some, forgot some. I have been excited and disappointed; been in love and had my heart broken.

It hasn't been my favorite year, but I am still grateful for the good things that happened. And although not all my prayers were answered in 2010, it was still a good year. I suppose now I have 2011 to look forward to seeing what God wants to do with my life.

I am not one to make New Year's Resolutions because I know I never keep them. Instead I just look at my current vision for my life and see if there are changes I need to make for the upcoming year. Inevitably I will be promising myself that I will live a healthier lifestyle this year including eating better, drinking more water, and exercising. I will work harder, pray more, be grateful for the little things, and not sweat the other stuff. I will be a better sister, daughter, aunt, co-worker and friend. Yes, I have big aspirations and no, I will not do all these things perfectly, but "if you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else."

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Carrots, Eggs, and Coffee

I read this on one of the blogs I have been following... Chasing Joy. I loved it and had to repost it myself.

CARROTS, EGGS & COFFEE

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up, She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil.. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil; without saying a word.

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl. Turning to her daughter, s he asked, ' Tell me what you see.'

'Carrots, eggs, and coffee,' she replied. Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg.

Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled, as she
tasted its rich aroma. The daughter then asked, 'What does it mean, mother?'

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity: boiling water. Each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened. The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

'Which are you?' she asked her daughter. 'When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you.

I want to be the coffee... how about you?

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Time to start blogging again...

I am going to start blogging again.... well at least I think so! Too tired to start tonight, but I have lots to blog about. Be back soon!

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Back to School Back to School...

I'm not ready!!!

Sunday, July 25, 2010

YA' JUST CAN'T TELL BY LOOKIN'

I meant to post this Friday, but I didn't get around to it until tonight...

This evening while in Walmart, I observed this group of young adults, 3 guys and 2 girls, walking around laughing and being for lack of a better word, goofy. Yeah, I know that word sounds like something my mother would say, but I really can't think of a better descriptor. Anyways, I didn't think much about them as I was just that age not too long ago (yes that's right, not too long ago) and could remember acting "goofy" on occasion. I know that is hard to believe, but it is indeed true. Well, the one difference I could see between me and my friends then, and these kids now was their attire. I realize the 80s was not a good fashion decade so stop laughing, but nonetheless, my point is that these kids' wife beaters, hats and baggy shorts along with their tattoos might have caused some people to form negative opinions of them just by their appearance.

As I was finishing loading my purchases into my jeep, I could hear them walking out behind me. I shut the back door and saw them walk by. Then what I saw next is why I am writing this blog tonight... There was a lady finishing loading stuff out of her cart into her car just as the kids walked past her. One of the boys runs over and says to her "I will get your cart." She looked a little surprised, as was I to be perfectly honest. He then brought it over and put it in the cart return and then ran back over to his friends and kept on talking and having fun. I don't see this type of kind behavior and respect from very many young people these days so I wanted to be sure to credit this young man, although I do not know him, for his random act of kindness. It encourages me to keep working with my students (and employees for that matter) to teach them that being nice matters and that treating people with kindness and respect is a characteristic that will get them much further in life than being rude and disrespectful. And in this world we live in today, it was just refreshing to see someone showing kindness to another person.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

BACK TO THE PLAYGROUND...

As I was going for a walk the other evening, I strolled (well actually I don’t stroll, I walk at a fairly high rate of speed for walking. It is not really a pertinent piece of info here, but my mother will comment on my use of the word stroll and so I thought I would just go ahead and clear it up) Ok, so back to my walk… I frequently walk with my iPod shuffle randomly choosing upbeat music to inspire me to burn some calories. However, there is one thing that will always make me turn it off. It is one of my all time favorite things. I am guessing that I am not the only person in my family that enjoys this particular thing. I am actually pretty confident in saying that both of my brothers and most likely my father also think this thing is one of the best sounds ever and is a sure sign that summer is here. So what is this sound? I don’t know how exactly to describe it, but it is the sound you hear when the baseball bat makes solid contact with the baseball. Well as I was watching and enjoying the sounds of the baseball game that was going on, it occurred to me that it sure looks a lot like yet another post-playground game… We all know what this game looks like in the relationship world. Words like “Maybe we should just be friends.” or “I don’t want to break up, I just need some space.” or “I think we should date other people.” get thrown around regularly in the post-playground game of baseball. Plus, in this situation not only do you have additional players, but also several pieces of equipment. Stay with me here cause I have a lot of thoughts running through my mind right now and it is probably going to get confusing, but is definitely right on!

Ok, referring back to one of my last posts, let's say that a couple have been playing the “game of tennis” and that it has been going on well, for basically anymore time than a couple of hits back and forth. Often times it is after several matches, (or dates in this case) but as we all know, once the game begins then it is on and whether it is two or three dates, two or three months, or two or three years, it all feels the same. Then one day, what used to be a 2-person game of tennis somehow becomes a group sport. The game of baseball! (And now back to my epiphany while watching the baseball game…)
Well, the way I see this is basically one of the former “tennis” players decides that they are no longer going to play only with just one person, but instead they want to play with another and maybe another and maybe yet another. This leaves the initial tennis partner in a precarious position. They have now been thrown into a new game and usually not of their choosing. Instead of being the only other person involved in the relationship, they have now become just one of players (or batters in this case) in the game. I am sure everyone is familiar with the baseball game. You know, the batter has to gear up with a bat and helmet and be ready to try to hit the few pitches that will come their way and then hope to hit the ball to a place where they are still in the game…usually hoping that they make it around the bases and get safely back to home plate. Now in the real game of baseball, one cheers on the other 8 batters who are on their team. In this case however, every batter is openly hoping that the other batters strike out! Now in some cases, if the batter can talk their friends into playing outfield they can possibly manipulate the game (you know, throw the ball around etc.) enough to allow their friend to have some advantages. And if they are really good friends, they will try to make sure that all the other batters get out. If not, well then it’s back to the bench. At this point, the batter can choose whether or not they want to sit the bench until their turn to bat comes around again, or if they want to kick the pitcher and their game to the curb and attempt to find another game with less players.

What I (a self-admitting bench-warmer on occasion) have observed is that most of the time what happens is that the moment the batter/benchwarmer decides to ditch the game and starts to leave the dugout, amazingly all of a sudden it’s their turn to be back in the game and they are up to bat. Now comes the hard part – (Especially for some of us) because if a person is an optimist like I am then they think this could indeed be the time that they get the perfect pitch and they have the perfect hit and that the baseball game with several players somehow will miraculously turn back into the nice two-player badminton game that it once was. This is what dreams are made of folks. Could this be why they call it the “field of dreams?” And has it ever worked out? Of course it has or we would never stay in the game. And who might you ask, has this worked out for? Well, several well-known people. Um like Kathleen Kelly, Jane Goodale, Sally Albright, Gracie Hart… (I could go on but I think I have made my point.) And what is it that all these people have in common??? If you don’t know, they are all FICTIONAL characters from romantic comedies. And even though we all know this, we still sometimes sit the bench waiting and wanting to believe that we might just be the lucky one and that the next romantic blockbuster will be based on our true story.

Hey the ever optimist in me says “it could happen,” the realist in me however, says “if you don’t get your behind off that doggone bench, you will never find out what great thing might be in the cornfield, just beyond the “Field of Dreams!”

Monday, May 10, 2010

In my next 19 years

I realized something today. I am twice as old as what it seemed that my life span was going to be on at this moment 19 years ago. I will tell you, the past 19 years seemed to have gone a lot faster than the first 19 years for some reason. I started to write about my night 19 years ago and while it always seems familiar, I remembered I blogged my thoughts about this last year. I feel the exact same way as I did last year. And even though I still have no more an indication of what God has in store for me, I still believe there is a plan. My mom reposted her blog from last year, so I think I will just repost mine as well. I hope with all my heart that when I am 19 x 3 that I will be blogging about all the great things that have happened and are continuing to happen in my life!

But for now, here is my last years post:

How many people can say beyond a shadow of a doubt where they were or what they were doing at exactly this moment 19 years ago? Probably a little over a dozen that I know of... me, my parents, Jenny, Keith, Jeremy, and I would say around 7 or 8 of my friends (if someone were to point out that today is May the 10th.)
19 years ago today at this very moment, my family was praying, my friends were crying, and I... well, I was dying. Yes, 19 years ago today I got a second chance at life. Not many people have to go through what me and my family went through, (and I am thankful that not many people have to) but not many people then have the testimony that I have.
19 years ago today, I was shot. It was a day that changed my life forever. It did not end like a sad movie, (thank the Lord) even though it was touch and go for a while. Instead it ended with me having a much greater appreciation for life and for those around me. It caused me to be more thankful for the good things in my life. Even now, 19 years later, when I feel like things are falling down around me, I look back and reflect on this very night 19 years ago and I realize that God has a plan and since he kept me here then I have a part in that plan.
I would love to be able to say I knew exactly what that plan was, or how it would come to full fruition, but I can't... 19 years later and I still don't know. I may never know, (at least not while I'm on this earth) but I truly believe we all have a purpose...A plan. And if we stay on the right track, God will be true to his word and give us a hope and a future (Jer 29:11)

"I think I'll take a moment, celebrate my age,
the ending of an era, the turning of a page,
Now its time to focus in on where I'll go from here
Lord have mercy on my next 19 years"

Thursday, April 22, 2010

AAADD... Beware You Might Have It Too!

Ok, so yesterday my friend Lori emailed me this forward titled AAADD (Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.) I read it and laughed hilariously because it kinda struck close to home for me. It explains some of the frustration in my life (SOME … but not ALL by any means LOL!) Anyways, I was honestly going to just copy the email and post it as a note on facebook and then post it on my blog, however… after my last oh I don’t know hour or so, I realized my daily life is basically the same darn thing.

I walked in my house after leaving Ophelia’s tonight with one goal in mind. Pay Bills! Ok, simple enough. I got paid yesterday so the money is in my checking account and I have all of my bills together on my desk so this should take 10 minutes tops. I put my school stuff on the couch and bring my purse over to the desk. This was approximately one hour and 20 minutes ago. I looked at my desk and realized I had a lot of extra magazines and miscellaneous other stuff strewn around and decided before I sat down to pay the bills I would just pitch some of it. I flip through a couple of the magazines and grabbed a couple of dumb advertisements for Dish Network and put them in a little stack. Good, I will throw the stuff in the trash and pay bills.

Well, I walk over to the trash can, which is right beside my sink, and notice that I have like 9 glasses in the sink (cause that is all I use at my house) that need to be washed. I may as well just knock those out real quick cause it will only take a second. So I go to grab a towel out of the drawer and notice that I have lightbulbs sitting on the counter waiting to go into the recessed light directly above me. If I would just climb up there and change the lightbulb then I could get those off my counter. So, I go over to get a chair to climb up on to change the lightbulb. Well, my chairs double as drying racks for some of my clothes after they have been washed so the chair had a couple of shirts hanging off of it. I guess I will just toss them into the dryer to fluff them for a second while I change this lightbulb. Of course I open the dryer door to find that I have clothes in there that need to be folded. Huh, forgot about them… then I look on the floor of my utility room and there are my clothes from the derby this past weekend. Dang, forgot about those too. Well, they need to have a little “Shout” put on them cause they are a little muddy. I grab it and start putting it on my jeans and remember that I had more clothes from that night tossed over yet another chair. I walk out and grab those and think, if I am going to start this I may as well turn on some music. I go back to my computer on my desk to open up iTunes and notice my bills… CRAP I got sidetracked!

I grab my checkbook and remember that I just got this new really cute checkbook cover… now where is it??? I dig around the desk (thinking I should really clean the rest of the desk up but I am NOT going to get sidetracked) and find it. Yay! I take my checks out of my old boring brown checkbook cover and attempt to move them into the new cute black with pink shoes and bags checkbook cover. The cover seems a little small and so I need to cut the back page of the checks so it will slide in. Where are my scissors? I think I remember seeing them in the bathroom for some reason (that I of course don’t remember) so I go in to get them. Sure enough they are there. Man I really need to wash towels. Oh…I was doing my laundry. I walk out of the bathroom with the scissors and set them down on the desk and look at the computer. Oh yeah… music. As I clicked on iTunes and looked around at my unpaid bills, my undone dishes, the lightbulbs on the counter, and the laundry laying all over the place I thought to myself, “Why bother posting the fictitious email Lori sent me? I truly live this everyday. Hmmmm….I will pull up facebook and then pay my bills!”

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

THIS AINT THE PLAYGROUND ANYMORE

Ok, so ever since my last post, (which by the way I was told that I needed to read it and follow my own suggestions) I have been trying to figure out just what game it is that comes after the playground games that men seem so fond of playing. I have been observing several of the fellas in my life lately… guys like my brothers, my friends, my girl friends’ husbands, and even men I don’t even know. What I found was that most post-playground games are slightly more complicated and require far more equipment than just a ball. Some games require things like a net, or a bat, or a car… or maybe some other type of toy (you know, like a power tool or something.) And some games actually necessitate a strong team to start the game or keep it going.
Let’s start with what looks like a volleyball game. Bump, Set, Spike… well at least that is what my recent experiences have looked like. The volleyball game usually occurs in two situations.

First scenario: Single girl’s friend decides she wants to set her friend up with her husband’s or boyfriend’s friend. Single girl stands blindly on one side of the volleyball net while her friend, her friend’s husband or boyfriend, and new potential date are all on the other side. It goes something like this… Friend hits the ball into play to her boyfriend/husband, the setter, who then must get the ball precisely to the exact right place for the new date guy to spike it over the net. If he likes this new mysterious girl, he hits the ball with just enough strength to get it across the net and into her hands. If not, pretty much he either deliberately hits the ball into the net so it hits the ground never making it across the net, or if a little of that dodgeball mentality is still in him, he spikes it across the net, slamming it down either directly on the ground or right in the girl’s face. In this case, the guy determines whether the game actually begins or not. If he does begin the game, the girl then gets to decide whether it becomes a true “volley” ball game or if she is not so interested and doesn’t want to play, then she can hit the ball back into the net or simply let it hit the floor and walk off…GAME OVER

Scenario #2: Guy initiates the game. For some reason he can’t get the ball over the net by himself. Not always, but usually it has to do with proximity. He’s just too far away from the girl so he needs some friends to help with the setting etc. to get the ball over the obstacle (the net in the case of volleyball) and into the single girl’s hands. Since the guy is the one to actually initiate the game, after the ball has successfully crossed over the net, once again, it is up to the girl to decide if she wants to hit the ball back across so that the game can continue.

Now, if either of these scenarios turn into a real game, what typically happens is that it becomes less of a team sport with the friends dropping out of play. The game may now begin to look a little more like another game that I have observed being played. This would be the game of badminton or if both players are more “type A” kind of players then it looks more like tennis.
Both badminton and tennis can have either 2 or 4 players, but remember, if there are only 2 players, it is necessary that there is one on each side of the net. If not and both players are on the same side of the net then you do not have a game, you have… a friend.

It seems as though I have had a great deal of practice with volleyball, badminton, and tennis lately. And while they are typically less painful than that darn dodgeball game, there is still usually a winner and a loser. And as we all know, losing is not any fun! So you ask, are these three the only kind of post playground games that exist? Certainly not! I have just scratched the surface here… there is definitely more to come!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

PLAYGROUND GAMES

I know it has been a while since I have been on here... life is busy. But
I learned something the other day at work... Since I work at an elementary school with over 1000 students, I overhear many things and observe far more behaviors than I would prefer in the student population. It just so happened that as I was leaving for lunch, the first graders were going outside for recess. Walking down the sidewalk were a boy and a girl. The boy says to the girl, “You wanna chase me?” and you know what she said???? Of course you do... she said and I quote, “OKAY.”

I stopped and looked at the two of them and shook my head as I was struck by an epiphany… we girls just aren’t very bright when it comes to boys. Ok, now I know you are thinking… gee, isn’t she the most brilliant single girl on the planet. I suppose this could be part of why I am single. :o) But that, my friends, I will save for another day.

Back to the playground.... As I look back on my past, I realize that my love life has been a myriad of playground games. It all began in grade school with basically the same words I heard just the other day, “Do you wanna chase me?” Knowing myself as well as I do, I am sure my answer was the completely devoid of thought response that the little first grade girl gave... I am sure I said “okay.” I mean think about it, don’t most relationships truly start out looking like a game of tag? In the beginning, the fun in tag is the chasing (and being chased.) Lets just take a little closer look at the game of tag...

Ok, first, you must have at least two people to play the game of tag.... If you only have one person, they can be running after someone, but if no one else is playing then face it.... it isn’t really a game of tag. (I personally would call it stalking.) Secondly, there are some problems with the game of tag. For instance, when two people are playing tag, one of the players might get tired of the game and just stop playing and goes off to do something else, thus leaving either the chaser or chasee to now be by themselves. Another little problem is that sometimes tag involves not only one other person, but several other players that are also being chased. Tag does not always appear to be real exclusive. Yet another aspect of tag that could go awry is that the object being chased is never going to weary of the game and fully intends to continue running and running ad nauseum. The obvious idea behind the game of tag is that you ultimately catch the target you are chasing... or that you finally stop running so you can be caught (depending on which side you are on.)

There is an element of mystery involved in tag. So many different strategies can be used. For instance, there is the direct approach… this is the no-holds-barred approach. It is the running out in the open as hard and fast as you can toward the desired object. It is no secret to anyone, it’s obvious, even to the casual observer what is happening. Then there is the more subtle approach.... here the chaser subtlely maneuvers their way toward the object by engaging in conversation with those around the object or pretending to do something else all the while they are edging closer to the object. A third tag technique is the reverse psychology approach. This is where the chaser acts like they aren’t playing the stupid game of tag at all. They act as though they are totally disinterested in the object. This typically results in one of two things happening… 1) the object doesn’t notice or doesn’t care that there is no game of tag being played or 2) wonders why there is no game and will initiate the game themselves.... even if they must do the chasing.... Ah yes, the game of TAG!

Then we girls get a little older and graduate to the game of kickball or even worse... dodgeball. We get sooo excited that the boy has asked us to play an obviously potentially harmful game and then wonder why we get hurt? Boys play rough! Sometimes they mean to kick or throw the really hard so that either a) it hurts the girls, or b) there is no possible way the girl could catch the object. But frequently the pain they inflict is just an unintentional unfortunate side effect of the game. Again, really..... so often we girls take one look at the dodgeball court and know good and well that the game can be terribly dangerous and painful, but do we say “NO” when we are asked to play??? Heck no! And why is it that we don’t say no? Well folks, it’s because we girls believe that maybe just maybe this time will be the time we dodge the pain and actually catch the ball.

How often do we actually win at these playground games? Well, I’m not really sure, but me and most of my girlfriends’ think not very often! And why not? Because, players by definition are there to play. They enjoy the game and just like any pro football or baseball player, they like the notoriety that comes along with being a successful player. Age is not a deterrent for the true player..... you know the ones I am talking about, the Brett Farves of the world (no offense to Brett (I personally kinda like him) but he is a good example. Even when they have passed their prime and really should hang up the pads or cleats, they do whatever it takes to continue the game.... even if it means inflicting various degrees of pain on themselves and the other participants in the game.

So is there any hope for this little first grade girl? Why sure there is! At least I hope so anyways! When she gets a little older, all she must do is introduce a new more enticing game. A game that will make the boy leave the dodgeball court and engage in a more fun, less painful form of play.

Now if this grown-up first grader could just figure out what that new enticing game is.............

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Signing Yearbooks


Well, I realize it has been a while... ok so one could say a long while. After this past weekend and having one of my long time friends remark on my lack of blogging, (that would be Julie) I decided to hop on and write a little blurb about getting older. I said oldER not old! I know nothing about getting old!

This past weekend I had a chance to get together with some of my longtime friends. These are the girls that go back to my earliest memories of friends. I run into a couple of them occasionally, but none of them live here and we never have the opportunity to sit down, reminisce, and make new memories... until this past weekend. Its funny, but as soon as we were together, it was though we were 13 again (certainly no where close to 40.) Laughing at all sorts of pictures, boys, life and other silly things. While our time together was short, it was a most enjoyable! I actually also just attended my (in a whispered voice) 20 year class reunion. As I look back on it and my recent visit with my childhood friends, I realize how important friends are in life. So many of our stories weren't tales of crazy things we did, but rather the ordinary everyday life things that we were just there with each other. Ok, there were a few discussions of some NFC (Not for Carol for those of you who don't know what the acronym means) things, but most were just memories of daily fun we had. Life isn't so much about the "big" things, but really way more about the little seemingly insignificant things. I call some of them my life-altering insignificant, monumental moments. I will one day blog about some of those in my life.

What a good time we all had and look at the picture...I mean really, we don't look too bad for pushing 40!

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Just a Few Tears...














Well, after 7 1/2 years of managing Bobe's Pizza, it is finally over. I can't believe that it is the end. I have so many mixed emotions this evening... sad, happy, excited, anxious. If I wrote about them all I would be up all night typing. I have several years of great memories. I can honestly say that I have successfully raised approximately 25 teenagers... well most of them successfully (some I did a better job with than others LOL). I have learned a lot in the last 7 1/2 years. A lot of what to do in business and a few things not to do in business. I have met wonderful people. Most of whom I hope to continue to see and talk to regularly.

Now onto my next endeavor... from pizza to coffee. Some things will be so different, but some things will be so much the same. I cannot wait!

Monday, July 6, 2009

Not quite a month


Well, it hasn't been quite a month, but I have no excuses (such as a hurt hand from too much 4-wheeler riding) other than I have just been having a busy summer! Ahhhh the life of a school teacher! As a matter of fact I am currently in Panama City Beach just livin the life... well except for today. The sky is about 3 shades of grey and there are droplets of water falling from above. I have to admit, it may be a blessing in disguise. I am a little sunburned so maybe a day out of the sun won't hurt me. Well... I suppose it did give me a chance to sit down at the computer...

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Older But Not Necessarily Wiser

Ok, I am not the best blogger ever... but in my defense, I was injured... well, sort of injured LOL. The truth is, I am just not as young as I used to be. I forget that (as most of us do I think) from time to time. Well, a couple of weeks ago happens to be one of those times.

My last post was a picture of me and two of my friends riding 4-wheelers. Now, up until two weeks ago I had never driven a 4-wheeler. But that day I learned how to drive it and proceeded to do so for about 6 hours straight. I knew that my hands and arms were getting tired and were starting to feel like jello toward the end of the evening, but I had no idea what kind of a wimp I really was. The next morning I woke up and basically had no strength or control of my right hand. Since I am right-handed that was not a good thing! Finally after about 5 days doing every single task with my left hand (including writing... and it was bad!) I finally went to get it checked out. I had actually sprained my thumb and bruised my hand clear through.

After a week of ice and therapy the feeling and control started to return. Yay! I could finally do a few things with my right hand again... Finally two weeks post ride I can do almost everything again. Still a little weakness, but at least now I can type again so I will try to be a better blogger!

Like I said, older but not necessarily wiser. Oh, and don't tell my mother, but I rode it again today...